Sony loses $892.5 million in the class action lawsuit...

[drwily008]

...as the title states: Sony loses $892.5 million in the class action lawsuit.

THIS IS BIG NEWS, READ IT ALL MERGERS (with Nintendo!) & DOWNSIZING FROM SONY.

All information is translated from the German CNN website.

From www.CNN.com/deutchland:

Sony will report an $892.5 million loss for Q1 2005. This loss comes as a result of a class action lawsuit started by consumers who purchased a defective/faulty Sony Playstation 2 between 10/15/2000 and 7/5/03. The lawfirm handling the lawsuit is the large Los Angeles based lawfirm Smith, Dewitt, and Jelinski.

The result of the penalty was a huge victory for all civilians involved, resulting in an average $21,500 per participating client. This loss came as a huge disappointment for Sony of Japan. Kenagi Matsumoto [Head of the lawfirm representing SOJ] had this to say: "I believe that an immoral injustice has been done on this day..." "...and futhermore my collegues and I will appeal this before a federal court."

Official representatives from Sony of Japan were not availible for comment. However a rumor leaked out of Nintendo of America that they were in the purchasing phase of their 2005 financial plan. Meetings have been confirmed between Nintendo of America and Sony of Japan, and it has been known for several weeks that Nintendo is to purchase 58% of Sony's current holdings.

This will be a triumph for Nintendo of America, who have reported a $67 million loss in Q4 2004 and Q1 2005. Nintendo has already made informal announcements that they will be merging the Mario franchise onto Sony's new Playstation Portable. Furthermore Sony's new technology BLU-RAY thought to be used exclusively for the "PS3" will be integrated into the "Nintendo Revolution".

The integration of BLU-RAY technology will allow for more data [20.75 Gigabytes] to be stored on one disc as opposed to the smaller [2.5 Gigabytes] able to be stored on Nintendo's own "mini DVD-ROM".

With the "Revolution" being capable of this much storage space on their new innovative system the results will be outstanding compelling consumers to play PS3 games, PSP games, Gamecube games, Nintendo DS uploads, and the new "Revolution" games. The current Wavebird controllers [a patented wireless controller by Nintendo) will be implemented into the new hardware.

Wow, this is totally awesome! I cant remember the last time I was so HAPPY! Ive got a grin from ear to ear for very obvious reasons.

[PrototypeFC3S]

Does this mean that Nintendo will be #1 once again? If so I think I need a change of underwear.

I think this is huge. But then again, I remember hearing somewhere that Nintendo would never go cross platform with other companies. This is all kinda wierd. Sounds a little too good to be true.

[Slate]

All i have to say is Whoa.. .

That's all.

[CreamSoda]

*Looks at Today's date*

No more comments needed.

[SoulBlazer]

Yeah, I'm calling BS on this one also.

Good joke, though.

[MegaDrive20XX]

God that would so rule...

[djbeatmongrel]

this sadly reaks of April Fools joke

sweet, this is post 666

[PrototypeFC3S]

*Looks at Today's date*

No more comments needed.

I totally forgot is was April.

[Slate]

*Looks at Today's date*

No more comments needed.

I totally forgot is was April.

I'll have to remember that 365 days from now. :P

I knew there was something odd going on..

[Sylentwulf]

Come on, $21,500 per person? lol. Maybe if that was in yen it would ALMOST be believable, right up until Nintendo suddenly buys 58% of stock (which is an odd number in itself)

All in all, not an overly believable A1 joke. Every date, company, and number is too off lol.

[drwily008]

I have one question:

Why would CNN make a "joke" about such a strange subject?

This can't be an attempt for a joke, why would a large corporation do such a thing?

[Slate]

\sweet, this is post 666

Not if the text is in My post! Post 259. :P

April joke... (Yeah i know i got it wrong.. Supposed to fool, not joke)

[calthaer]

These jokes purporting to be real news get old fast.

Come up with an original joke for once.

[Slate]

These jokes purporting to be real news get old fast.

Come up with an original joke for once.

Read my post up above.

[GobopopRevisited]

This wouldn't be good news at all... Should this happen, Who do you think would end upl designing the next Game Boy? Ken "The Architect" Kutargi... :/

[DynastyLawyer]

Does this mean that Nintendo will be #1 once again? If so I think I need a change of underwear.

I think this is huge. But then again, I remember hearing somewhere that Nintendo would never go cross platform with other companies. This is all kinda wierd. Sounds a little too good to be true.

Lawyers have a saying: "If an offer sounds too good to be true, it probably is."

I have one question:

Why would CNN make a "joke" about such a strange subject?

This can't be an attempt for a joke, why would a large corporation do such a thing?

Your link to CNN isn't working. I checked the legal section of CNN (The United States CNN, of all places) and didn't see it. Therefore, I'll believe it when I get the Westlaw Citation to it, punk.

Not to mention that the news article is filled with a bunch of unlikely elements. "Huge victory for all civilians?" Try plaintiffs. "I believe that an immoral injustice has been done on this day..." Like Lawyers give a rat's ass about moral injustices, unless they're defense attorneys on the criminal side of things."...and futhermore my collegues and I will appeal this before a federal court." Biggest "no shit" statement from a lawyer ever. OF COURSE YOU'LL APPEAL. AND YOU'LL APPEAL IT TO THE COURT ABOVE IF IT'S IN FEDERAL COURT, AND YOU WON'T APPEAL AT ALL IF IT'S IN STATE COURT, BECAUSE OF FUCKING RES JUDICATA.

[Slate]

\sweet, this is post 666

Not if the text is in My post! Post 259. :P

April joke... (Yeah i know i got it wrong.. Supposed to fool, not joke)

Just so you guys know: I'm not intending to get people mad. Just a freindly joke.. No offense, please!

[calthaer]

These jokes purporting to be real news get old fast.

Come up with an original joke for once.

Read my post up above.

As an attempt to fool people, it's even lamer than if it were intended to joke.

[tholly]

at least this was a little better than the other fake news story that was "released" a few days early

[Pantechnicon]

Come on, $21,500 per person? lol. Maybe if that was in yen it would ALMOST be believable,

Time for a quick off-topic legal lesson: Even if this story were true, a settlement figure as such doesn't mean that's how much cash everybody's going to get. All that figure represents is settlement divided by # of heads represented in the class action.

Most of such a large payoff would go to - you guessed it - the lawyers. What's left is arranged into a trust administered by a 3rd party that pays a small compensation to claimants in the suit as well as post-ruling claimants. You see these ads (run by law firms, I must point out), for example, that say if you took such-and-such drug you can get part of the settlement. What really happens is that the law firm gets a compensation for "finding" you and getting you to waive any further legal action, and you get treated to a free physical exam paid for out of the trust. That's your share of the settlement.

If this Sony story were really true, that $21,000 or whatever would be whittled down to a coupon good for $25 off your next Sony purchase. Dem's da breaks, kids...