Worst possible video game licenses

[ManekiNeko]

We've seen some pretty stupid games in the past with inappropriate licenses hastily tacked onto them. I challenge you to top these blunders by picking a television show, movie, or other property that would never, ever work as a video game.
My choice is the short-lived animated sitcom The Critic. I thought this was a clever series and one of the better Simpsons clones from the early to mid 1990s. However, I can't possibly see how it could translate to the video game medium. The Critic appeals to an older audience with its sophisticated humor and film references... a video game based on the show would have little of the television show's sense of humor and almost no mass market appeal.

JR

[FABombjoy]

So, we're suppsed to figure out what would have been the worst license?

In that event, I choose the movie On Golden Pond (http://us.imdb.com/Plot?0082846). I couldn't imagine a more miserable gaming experience, unless somebody created "Beaches: (http://us.imdb.com/Plot?0094715) the Game, now for your NES!"

[omnedon]

Hmmmm.

Well, I thought of a really bad license. I won't post it though, because it would be in such bad taste, and so offensive, as people would somehow think I was bad just for having thought of it.

:P

[Alex Kidd]

I think a video game based on Frasier would suck

Guaranteed you'd be Frasier and everyone else in the cast will have gone "mad" for some reaosn and kidnapped his father, and you have to beat each person in some crazy (read inexplicably inappropriate) area.

Alex Kidd

[hezeuschrist]

Hmmmm.

Well, I thought of a really bad license. I won't post it though, because it would be in such bad taste, and so offensive, as people would somehow think I was bad just for having thought of it.

:P

I know you were thinking of Goatse: The VideoGame!

[TVs Hasselhoff]

Why is everyone trying to make one up?

The two worst licenses I've seen have been Largo Winch (french detective, anyone?) and City of Lost Children.

Why would you make a game based on a French independent film?

Notice how these are both French. (scratching head)

[BenT]

Webster: The Fighters

Ted Koppel's Nightline: Second Strike

Wesley Willis: Make Your Own Music Video

Wait, that last one would be cool.

[Captain Wrong]

Wesley Willis: Make Your Own Music Video

I will buy whatever console that comes out for.


How about a Manimal fighting game based on the Bloody Roar engine?

[ManekiNeko]

"Webster: The Fighters."

(giggles a bit, then breaks out laughing)
On a semi-serious note, I'd like to play that Space Suckers game Gary Coleman was addicted to in an episode of Diff'rent Strokes.

JR

[Mayhem]

Shaq Fu or Home Alone I guess...

[Queen Of The Felines]

Cabella's American Care Bear Hunter
You Don't Know Jack Black
Bloody Beanie Babies: The Director's Cut
Golden Girls Xtreme Beach Volleyball

Kristine

[portnoyd]

Mr Belvedere's Rampage: The FPS to end all FPSes - a hot tea was never so deadly. The game would be overrun with Ueckerdemons.

dave

[Atar1G1rl]

Wesley Crusher vs. Luke Skywalker Whining Game

[Arqueologia_Digital]

Street fighter: The movie is very poor for me...

[Phosphor Dot Fossils]

Wesley Crusher vs. Luke Skywalker Whining Game

I was about to suggest Masters Of Teras Kasi, but naaaaaahhh.

Worst real license use I've seen: P.T. Barnum's Acrobats for the Odyssey 2. Now, let me get one thing straight - I love the game itself. But Phillips went and spent money to use that name? Arrrgh. Granted, the Power Lords license wasn't that great an affiliation either, but the game's awesome.

I regret that better use was never made of the Ren & Stimpy license. Buckaroo$ for the NES is a good attempt, but there are so many unique situations from R&S that are eminently game-worthy.

Considering the weather we're getting at this very moment, I'd suggest "Twister: The Game," but (a) I think it's already been turned into a pinball table, and (b) try the "cyclone" stage of the otherwise crappy coin-op Pioneer Balloon. :P

[ehall]

Finding Forrester: the game.

Something along the lines of where's Waldo with literary clues. "I think that I shall never see..."

Quick look behind the tree!

[ehall]

Golden Girls Xtreme Beach Volleyball


You should be beaten for this.

:D

[stonecutter]

Any game that would be based on todays " reality" tv shows would suck seriously.... just like the shows!

[Raedon]

Wesley Willis: Make Your Own Music Video

Wait, that last one would be cool.

Westley Willis is the funniest.. Pepsi, the taste of a new generation..

[Anonymous]

How about a Hooters game? Or a McDonalds game? No wait, I've got it, we'll take Michael Jordan and put him in a platformer about some parrallel world that's linked with chicago!

No, nevermind, those are just too godawful. No one would ever make those games.


What? O_O

[Li Wang]

I'm still dissapointed Acclaim never gave the Taco Bell Dog his very own unplayable PS1 platformer. They could have called it "Taco Bell Dog: Big Trouble in Little Mexico" or some shit like that.

Is there even a such thing as Little Mexico?

[stonecutter]

A McDonalds game has been done already on the NES

[Anonymous]

I know.

[scooterb23]

Here's one that probably 3 people will get, and they won't think it's funny, but I liked it when I came up with it.

Dance Dance Revolution: Aphex Twin Mix

[BenT]

Is there even a such thing as Little Mexico?
Let's leave my nether regions out of this.

[Atar1G1rl]

Dance Dance Revolution: Aphex Twin Mix

OMG- my head and feet would explode trying to DDR to that!! HA!!

[Queen Of The Felines]

Dance Dance Revolution: Aphex Twin Mix

I'm one of the three, and yes, I do think it's funny. :)

Kristine

[Captain Wrong]

A couple new rhythm games for ya:

Soul Train Calibur

Metal Gear Solid Gold

[Phosphor Dot Fossils]

How about an educational game for Generation Y, sorta like Microsurgeon?

MTV Mucus Generator

[l_lamb]

Any game that would be based on todays " reality" tv shows would suck seriously.... just like the shows!

Of course Infogrames (Atari :( ) already did a "Survivor" game and there's an American Idol game on the way from Codemasters.

I'm hoping there's never a game done based on To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar. Controlling Wesley Snipes in high heels is not something I'd want to do.

[Wavelflack]

I think you guys should stick to legitimate bad examples, rather than making them up. Proposing titles such as "Faggot Simulator 2003" or "IRS Database: The Action Game!", or whatever, isn't nearly as amusing as reading about poor examples real companies spent bucks on.

My pick? I remember reading an old issue of Gamefan lampooning a company who licensed the rights for a Federal Express game. That has to be one of the worst (and was never realized, of course).

[Kid Ice]

Blues Brothers 2000

is the worst license ever. THE WORST. You could not possibly make up a worse license. Who was the IDIOT who thought of that one? That's just insane!

the kid

[WiseSalesman]

Can't make a worse liscence? How about Dukes of Hazzard? Although, for actually realized games, I think Hooters beats that one out.

[Gus]

Although, for actually realized games, I think Hooters beats that one out.

Going to agree here. Hooters Road Trip possibly the worst game I own. I'd play a Mythicon game for hours - with the volume CRANKED - before I'd go back and give HRT another spin.

[swlovinist]

Possible? Well they have done it, and the most horrible thing about it is that they have done it multiple times. Oh my gosh these games want me to cry just looking at the screenshots..........I they have kids they are going to grow up thinking that Rap Jam Vol 1 is the best game ever!!!!

[Aswald]

Brady Bunch- The Videogame!

Top that...

[slapdash]

Brady Bunch- The Videogame!

Top that...

Sim Incest: The Brady Bunch Munch Expansion Pack!

[MarkM2112]

How about "Shaq Flu"? Shaq has the flu, and you have to nurse him back to health so he can play in the Big Game! This would be like those Tamagochi (sp?) type games... x_x

[thegreatescape]

60 minutes: Panic Merchant simulation.
Choose from a selection of hosts, and see how many people YOU can scare into buying a y2k survival kit, or stupid plastic sheets that keep out radiation.

Its just too bad that NOTHING will ever come close to the stupidity of the mary kate and ashley games. I hate them so very,very much. :snipersmile:

[Shadysmurf]

Differnt Strokes: The Game,What you Talking About Willis?

[Sanriostar]

Of course Infogrames (Atari :( ) already did a "Survivor" game and there's an American Idol game on the way from Codemasters.

Dear God, let it be a FPS.... :angry:

[Sanriostar]

60 minutes: Panic Merchant simulation.
Choose from a selection of hosts, and see how many people YOU can scare into buying a y2k survival kit, or stupid plastic sheets that keep out radiation.


...and if you make the Y2K selling take place now, you have a real challenge!

[The Manimal]

Haha, those Simpsons console games were bad.


Anyways....how about a Martha Stewart or Jenny Jones game?

[djbeatmongrel]

The Titanic RPG for NES based off of the leonardo dicaprio movie

[Ixiah]

Mission Impossible, the NES game

[Sotenga]

Have to bump this topic. Anyway, here is the worst ever idea for any video game, based off of something really fugged up. Marvel vs. Capcom, only with everything really sucking, as opposed to everything being great. Okay, here it is:

Charles in Charge vs. Mama's Family!

The ultimate battle between two shitcoms! Who will win? I don't give a flying piece of fecal matter!

Copyright 20x6. A joint venture of THQ/Acclaim.

I hear this is going to be Acclaim's last ever game... well, if it existed, it would be, seeing as they're on the verge of bankruptcy. :D

[Stamp Mcfury]

If your asking the worst Idea for a video game that was actually made then I'll Have to say the Law and Order PC Game (http://www.legacyinteractive.com) wins that by a long shot!

Runners up would be all those Simpsons games by Acclaim, Home improvement for the Snes, MCkids NES, South Park 3D Shooter, And of course ET for the Atari.

Worst possible Ideas could be "Gigily the 3d FPS", "Gilmoore Girls MMORPG", "All the Presidents Men" (run down leads on the Watergate scandal in a 3d rendered envioment), A version of the Sims based on Frank Herberts "DUNE", And Police Academy the RTS war game.

[CartCollector]

Seinfield: The game about nothing!
Or, in a similar vein, Curb your Enthusiasm. You'd win by pissing people off.

[evildead2099]

Joe vs. The Volcano: The Video Game

[shopkins]

Real ones:

N'Sync: Get To the Show. I haven't played it. Don't have to.

Yo Noid! Immortalizes a rightly forgotten Domino's Pizza campaign. I rented and played this one most of the way through to the end.

Made up:

What about a game that simulates the assasination of JFK? Oh yeah.

A sidescroller based on The Nanny, with a constant loop of her horrible laugh.

Golden Girls: Hentai

No Exit MMORPG: Hell is Other Players. The point is to drive other players insane with despair. For real.

[dvdguy]

The 1981 crapfest THE ENTITY was actually licensed to be an Atari 2600 game by 20th Century Fox Games. Why is this a bad idea? Well the movie is about a woman who is RAPED REPEATEDLY BY A GHOST.

[TheRedEye]

Whoever said Blues Brothers 2000 had the right answer, though the Homey Da Clown game for PC might be a close second.

Also, I would buy Shaq Flu.

[Sanriostar]

So, we're suppsed to figure out what would have been the worst license?

In that event, I choose the movie On Golden Pond (http://us.imdb.com/Plot?0082846). I couldn't imagine a more miserable gaming experience
I donno, the Odessey voice could probably do a pretty good Kathrine Hepburn imitation... :roll:

[soniko_karuto]

The 1981 crapfest THE ENTITY was actually licensed to be an Atari 2600 game by 20th Century Fox Games. Why is this a bad idea? Well the movie is about a woman who is RAPED REPEATEDLY BY A GHOST.

And is that a good thing or a bad thing? I mean, uh, atari 2600. well, sorry then.

[Dobie]

I think a game based on 7th Heaven would be pretty awful. Anything based on a teen melodrama just wouldn't translate well, unless it was a dating sim or the like.

As for a real license, I'll go with Kool-Aid. Making a game based on any beverage, no matter how tasty, just can't be a good idea.

[SKVermin]

Kobe Bryant's Off-Court Slam
Virtual Proctologist
Michael Jackson's Escape from Neverland


What about a game that simulates the assasination of JFK? Oh yeah.


Unfortunately, that one's already been done : http://www.jfk-reloaded.com

[Xantan the Foul]

Mr Belvedere's Rampage: The FPS to end all FPSes - a hot tea was never so deadly. The game would be overrun with Ueckerdemons.

dave

I would so play that. LOL

[studvicious]

Ben Affleck Is Missing!

[slurpeepoop]

Socks the Cat?

[PC-Famicom64]

Here's one that probably 3 people will get, and they won't think it's funny, but I liked it when I came up with it.

Dance Dance Revolution: Aphex Twin MixWell how about Dance Dance Revolution:Parodius Mix.

[SirDrexl]

Blues Brothers 2000

is the worst license ever. THE WORST. You could not possibly make up a worse license. Who was the IDIOT who thought of that one? That's just insane!

the kid

A few years ago in EGM there was an article where they interviewed this anonymous guy who talked about how and why bad games get made. He said he was part of a team that had to make a game for the N64 based on a really bad license, which was not revealed in the article. I think this was the one he was talking about.

[SirDrexl]

Hey, did anyone mention JFK Reloaded?

[tonyvortex]

we almost had not only a bon jovi game but a new kids on the block game for the nes.i still remember those being announced in EGM as a kid.

[shopkins]

I used to play Kool-Aid man for 2600 all the time when I was a kid. I remember liking the sounds it made, like (I think) the slurping sound those thirsties made.

[Barbarianoutkast85]

I havent liked any Jurassic Park games so Id say that license and MTV remote controll for NES I dont know I just have bad memorys of that game

[banski83]

Here's one that probably 3 people will get, and they won't think it's funny, but I liked it when I came up with it.

Dance Dance Revolution: Aphex Twin Mix

I would pay good cold hard cash (lots of) to own that game.

I'd pay even more to watch some annoying 12 year old kids trying to dance to it and watching the videos at the same time. Would scare the hit out of them, and I'd damn near wet myself from laughing at them.

I can't stop laughing at this mental image of a kid desperately trying to dance to it in a crummy old bowling alley like the one near me (Its full of about 6-8 Dance Dance Revolution arcade cabits, and packed with annoying 12 year olds when ever I went in.

LOL LOL LOL

Scary as hell but funny, it would be. basically DDR with this:

@_@ :evil: @_@ :evil: @_@ :evil: :evil: :evil: X_x :evil: @_@ :-P LOL :angry: :evil: :evil: :evil:

strobing through it all the time. Class but freaky!

[banski83]

How about:

Dance Dance Revolution: The Prodigy Early Years

DDR with early acid trance, magnificent!!!

lol

[Avatard]

Hahahah! That Kobe game brought tears too my eyes.
How about...

Iron Chef: Tofu Battle
Trading Spaces
Antiques Roadshow (I just gave myself the willies)
Virtual Yoko Ono Moshpit (no wait, I'd have to buy that)
Great White: Fireworld
7th Heaven Matchmaker
Andy Griffith's Virtual Cop

I could come up with a dozen more but I'm already cringing with pain.

[RockyRaccoon]

Saved by the Bell would make a TERRIBLE LISCENE to make a game from.

Also any games based on a Movie about a game stink... they were a game to begin with! Just imagine....

"Street Fighter - The Movie" game...it's ALREADY A FREAKING GAME!

or..I know..lets make...

"Super Mario Bros - THE GAME" ..... nuff said.

~Rocky

[RockyRaccoon]

Saved by the Bell would make a TERRIBLE LISCENE to make a game from.

Also any games based on a Movie about a game stink... they were a game to begin with! Just imagine....

"Street Fighter - The Movie" game...it's ALREADY A FREAKING GAME!

or..I know..lets make...

"Super Mario Bros - The Movie" Game ..... nuff said.

~Rocky

[cessnaace]

X_x Worst real games (that I have) based on a TV series or movie:

1) E.T. for the Atari 2600 (the game that led to the big crash of '84)
2) GILLIGAN'S ISLAND for the NES (shame shame, Bandai)
3) ALF for the Sega Master System

Good ideas gone bad.

1) SPEED RACER for the PlayStation
2) ULTRAMAN for the SNES (OK, but could have been better)
3) SUPERMAN for the N64 (bad, bad game)

Strange licenses done well:

1) WACKY RACES for the Sega Dreamcast (could have been bad, but was actually quite well done).
2) WALT DISNEY WORLD QUEST MAGICAL RACING TOUR for the Dreamcast. I love racing in the Haunted Mansion. My favorite: racing in Pirates of the Carribean. A job well done!

[stevec1636]

As for real games i have to go with
1.Wayne's World for super nintendo, I never could do anything but send stupid sound waves out of my guitar.
2. Knight Rider for Nes. Bad just Bad. enough said.

If I was going to make a bad game up. that would be um.........

1. American History X the game
2. 7th Heaven vs. Doom winner take all
3. DDR max what's happening ediiton where you play as Re-Run

there is a game i would love to se get made as a good FPS and that is Starship Troopers.

[Iron Draggon]

Pee Wee's Peepshow, a game about Pee Wee Herman visting an adult video arcade. You play as Pee Wee, and try not to get caught spanking Mr. Willy! HAHA!

And now for a real potential license that I think would make a great game:

I Love Lucy!

A collection of minigames based on the most famous espisodes of the show.

[esquire]

Dance Dance Revolution: Dirty Dancing Remixes - Emulate Patrick Swayze on everyone's favorite rhythm game!

Fantasy Island - Play as Tatoo, at the beck and call of Mr. Rourke while still awaiting your own fantasy, to no longer be vertically challenged.

O.J. - The Chase - Drive your favorite white Ford Bronco around the freeways of LA at low speeds avoiding the wall of police cars driving behind you, while getting points for getting stupid onlookers to come out and cheer you on as you try yo make it to the border.

Geraldo Rivera - The Original Tomb Raider - Play as Geraldo as you explore the empty vaults of Al Capone and get humiliated on national TV.

Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot! - The Video Game - Players get to play as either Sly Stallone or Estelle Getty as the tandem clean the streets of crime.

[pragmatic insanester]

battle royale - the game.





jesus christ, of course i'm kidding.


honorable mention: the 9/11 game that seemed to disapear a few yars ago. i would have played it too. it was like a FPS without weapons.