A pinball machine saved my soul today

[thom_m]

First of all: moderators, if this belongs in another forum (like LORE, for example), please move it.

Her's the thing: i'm living the darkest moment of my whole life rigfht now. I live more than a thousand miles from my family and true friends, my wife is leaving me, I have a lot of debts. I spend weeks without going out and having some fun, since my "friends" here either have girlfriend s now or are to fuckin' busy to remember me when they go out. Due to financial problems, I still leave with my ex-wife; she has never been so beautiful, her friends are much more reliable than mine, and she gets to have a lot of fun every damned weekend whlie I stay home alone.

Anyway, I'm feeling really depressed, and today was a rough day. Sad and pissed, I decided to go out by myself, or else I'd goinsane. I knew there were two arcade cabinets and a pinball machine at this bar here, and hped they were on.

When I arrived, the games avaible were KOF '98 (which I sauck at) and Neo Geo Cup. DAmn. I spent two tokens playing KoF and, still mad (even more, after the beating), decided to try the pinball machine. A Lost World:> Jurassic Park table by Sega.

I was never good at pinball, even though my dad is sort of a pinball genius. The thing is, today, I had a blast. I got to know the table better, and started actually learning how to direct the ball. A few tokens later, all my problems were behind: I got lots of free balls, replays...it was really fun!

This may sound dumb, but the simple act of having a good night playing some pinball lifted my spirit in a way that I didn't even think would be possible, considering all the shit I've been through lately. And it's good to know that, whenever I feel down, that table's gonna be there for me. That I don't need any phney friends to have a good night.

Later this evening, I decided to go to another bar here, and stumbled upon some nice co-workers, and spent the rest of the night with them. Once again, if it weren't for that pinball table, i'd probably go home feeling even more depressed and cry myself to sleep (yeah, things are THAT bad).

I understand that all this talk may sound really corny to you, but I needed to share it with someone, and realized you guys were the only ones who could actually understand what happened. It's good to know that, sometimes, even something as unimportant as a pinball game can do that much for you. Makes you look at life at a less pessimistic way - whic is all I need now.

Well, that's it. Now I'm going to bed feeling much better than when I left it this morning. And, fot that, I gotta thank an old-ass pinball machine that just happened to be at the right place, at the right time.

[Baloo]

Good to see that your spirits have been lifted by video games, don't worry, you'll get through these bad times.

[hellfire]

The nintendo 64 lifted my spirits when I was young, I dident have many freinds and I was bullied almost every day, the freinds I did have liked me for the video games I had. When I got my n64 It took my mind off of everything, I dont think I could have gotten through hard times without it.

[poloplayr]

Hey buddy, glad to hear you had a great time with that pin and that you had the balls to share your story/situation. I believe I speak for everyone but you're with friends here.

I know very well how therapeutic gaming can be and how it's the perfect form of escapism. I had a very very crap childhood and escaped into games in order not to go insane. I used to fear going to school every morning and even more so to await my father's return home from work. He continue bullying me and make fun of me for being bullied at school. I almost never dared to bring any friends home and I suffered from extremely bad migraines because I was worried and scared at most waken hours of my life. When I played video games none of that existed and all my bad thoughts would disappear. This is most likely why video games grew to have such a central role in my life.

So, I can only hope things will get better soon and all that crap will fade away in history.

Until then, keep gaming!

[adam_devry]

COD4 takes my mind off the bad stuff i mean its a game where you have to think about whats going on around you so you might want to try it. It works for me

[otaku]

sad as it may be video games are a huge part of what keeps me going when things get tough (seems most of the time)

[hellfire]

sad as it may be video games are a huge part of what keeps me going when things get tough (seems most of the time)

same with me, a few summers ago I had nothing to do, so I played runescape mostly every day from 9am to 12 pm

[The Clonus Horror]

I just lost my job two days ago, and yesterdat I found out my little dog (the first one I've ever had and I'm 33) has a condition where her kneecaps pop in-and-out of joint in her hind legs that will eventually require surgery. I realized that I have no single friends. Normally, I'd complain about how hard it is going to be to find a job in this economy, let alone this area of northern Wisconsin, but I think that I will eventually be able to piece things together. In the meantime, I was suddenly faced with a few days of "what the hell do I do with my time now?" I ended up playing Left 4 Dead online with complete strangers trying to finish the Blood Harvest campaign on Expert. I have never used a headset while gaming before, but I felt as though I had to this time. So, I plugged it in and had a great time. We never finished the campaign, but I realized that my stress levels were way down. My stepfather was basically a giant bully when I was growing up, and I would spend hours in my bedroom playing Punch-Out and Pro Wrestling to escape.

Here's the thing: The world is a very flawed place, basically because of human beings. As an adult, this is very depressing, because you are right there in the middle of all of them, unless you are priveliged. When I spent my early 20's learning this the hard way, I was staying away from video games because I was assuming it just wasn't the adult thing to do. And when things got stressful, I began to drink and have strings of one-night-stands or useless one-month relationships that would all end badly. Now, in my 30's, I've gone back to fishing, music, games, hiking, etc...to replace self-destructive self-medicating behaviors. There are worse things to do than play games.

[Blanka789]

Sorry to hear that you're going through hard times, and I hope that things start to look up for you. As said before, you are with friends on this board.

I've always believed video games are somewhat cathartic, whether violence is involved or not. Good to know I'm not alone!

[thom_m]

I really, REALLY appreciate the support, guys. Although I don't actually know anyone in person, I DO feel among friends here, like some of you were kind enough to mention. More than with some of my "real" friends, actually. Maybe that's why I felt this was the right place to let it all out.

From the bottom of my heart, I wish everyone in this board who are facing a bad time as I am can come out of it soon, strong, happy and replenished. And, while we can't, may our games/arcades be there for us (and also this place!). Like Clonus Horror said he once did, I was beggining to wonder if gaming was the adult thing to do right now. Last night proved me wrong, and so did you guys. Thanks a lot for that!

[hellfire]

Its really hard making friends, but dont give up. Your not going to make freinds by staying inside all day, you really need to put yourself out in the world. A good place to start would be an arcade.

[InsaneDavid]

Pinball and arcades can do these things - which is why I miss them so much. At the annual arcade and pinball show here that feeling rushes back. For an entire weekend there's no stress, no problems, no anything - just fun with a bunch of other people there for the same reason.

[NayusDante]

You have to be careful about gaming when you're in that kind of mental state. The best thing to do is play something stimulating, but not frustrating. If you can get yourself absorbed in something, it's the best thing in the world.

I'm by no means a relationship expert (quite the opposite), but have you and your wife sought counseling? I won't make assumptions or judgments about your religious beliefs, but I will say that I believe my church offers such services without cost, if that's a path you'd be willing to take. Just thought I should throw that out there.

[thom_m]

Thanks a lot, Nayus, really! But my divorce, as it its, is a really thought through decision. We talked about it a couple of years before, and decided to try again, but bnow it's for good, I guess.

Me and my ex are still really good friends, you know; we don't work together as a couple anymore, however - and, since we have a kid, we think that it's better for her to have divorced parents who love and respect each other than to have married parents who'll eventually hate each other by forcing a situation. That's what my parents did, and I always had a really functional and loving family, despite the fact they weren't married to each other.

However, although it's a quite friendly separation, it's not easy at all. We were together for almost 9 years, since college. We had a daughter while very young, we moved out to a far away city looking for a better life...we went through a lot together. It's sad to see this relationship end, even in good terms. I still have feelings for her, and we're still living together, which makes things even more difficult. But I'm moving out this month, and I guess it'll be easier to deal with all this.

Once again, thanks to all of you guys for all the support. It does mean a lot, believe me.

[Blanka789]

I support your decision my friend, although I can't say I've ever been in that situation. I'm sure you'll pull out of it, especially with the help of the pinball machine!