Bokosuka Wars

[Graham Mitchell]

Ok, guys. Bokosuka Wars is perhaps the worst Famicom/NES game I've ever played. It's so bad it's disturbing. Which, in turn, makes it awesome. The music is like nails on a chalkboard. The animation is...well I wouldn't call that animation. It does have the best Game Over screen ever (WOW! YOU LOSE--somebody's got this in their sig around here. I'm expecting you to post in this thread, you hear me buddy? :) )

Perhaps the best feature of Bokosuka Wars is that I have no idea what the hell I'm supposed to do. Like many classic 2600 games, there are times when I can't even figure out what I'm controlling on the screen, or if my button pushing is doing anything at all (like during a 'fight').

Some of you might be interested to know that the version of Bokosuka Wars that I'm playing is a Shenmue hack. The title screen says "Copyright 2001 Yu Suzuki", and the lead character is a Ryo Hazuki sprite hack. The color palatte is all screwy, too.

Anyway, this game has captured my heart with its utter incompetence. It makes Ponycanyon's Tiger Heli look like a well-scripted, soberly and painstakingly-arranged masterpiece by comparison. But I don't know much about it, and I'd like to start some conversation about this lovely, lovely game. Box art scans, cart scans, magazine features, whatever---anything you've got say or show me, I want to hear or see.

Thanks in advance, guys.

[Ed Oscuro]

First ran across this game on eBay. I raced my clammy fingers over the keyboard - I had to try the ROM! Oh, god, I'm glad I did.

It's very, very bad, worse even than Zombie Hunter, and probably worse than Route-16 Turbo.

[Ze_ro]

there are times when I can't even figure out what I'm controlling on the screen, or if my button pushing is doing anything at all (like during a 'fight').
If I'm not mistaken, pressing buttons during a fight has no effect at all... I think the outcome is entirely random despite it prompting you to hit the B button.

--Zero

[Graham Mitchell]

there are times when I can't even figure out what I'm controlling on the screen, or if my button pushing is doing anything at all (like during a 'fight').
If I'm not mistaken, pressing buttons during a fight has no effect at all... I think the outcome is entirely random despite it prompting you to hit the B button.

--Zero

Which is as I suspected. Do you know how to play the game? What am I trying to do here? And how do I free my little soldiers from the jails (it looks like I can control them, anyway...)? Any clue?

[pragmatic insanester]

actually, i heard the game has been completely misunderstood. check gamefaqs, as i think i remember someone posting the actual method of gameplay.

[Ze_ro]

Well, I looked at GameFAQs, and found this review (http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/nes/review/R43029.html), which goes a long way to explain some of this game... Amazingly enough, the reviewer also wrote a FAQ for the game (http://db.gamefaqs.com/console/nes/file/bokosuka_wars_a.txt)! Here's all the information you really need from those two links:


The story takes place in some unnamed land. King Ogreth (the big blob guy laughing at you on the ''WOW! YOU LOSE!'' screen) of the Basam Empire has succeeded in conquering the kingdom of Suren.

The defeated King Suren is now preparing to strike back, but all 49 of his soldiers have been captured by Ogreth or turned into rock/trees/other objects. King Suren sets off on his quest to defeat Ogreth who is, apparently, only 600 meters away from him.

He must recover his lost warriors and sally forth to battle to the death with the forces of Ogreth to defeat the Basam Empire and reclaim his kingdom.
Yep, apparently this game DOES have a storyline. Although I'm still not entirely sure whether this guy actually researched this (as he claims) or just made it all up. He also sums up the gameplay:


Basically, you start the game with King Suren who needs to find his warriors to help him defeat King Ogreth. This is done by slamming into trees/rocks/walls because sometimes, the act of slamming into them will restore your lost friends to their real form (Thank you for returning my wand. I would have surely been stuck in that dreadful form).

When you move, so does your army. You can move up, down, left, or right. But of course, the minions of Ogreth abound. Slamming into one of them will cause a battle tile to appear. The outcome of this battle is based on the offensive power of both your unit and the enemy's unit with a bit of randomization. Sometimes you win and sometimes you don't. But the advantage is based on your unit's power.

Winning fights increases the stats of both you and your units. For more details on this see my FAQ. Your soldiers and knights will change to a gold class after they've won three fights.

The idea is to have them fight so you don't get killed. Battles involving the hero can easily be lethal. If he died, it's game over. While he may have the potential to be your strongest unit (by only 10 points) that's by no means reason to send him dashing into the fray. He's a king after all and the whole point of having peons is to die for you.

And die they shall.
I haven't tried any of this, but it certainly sounds like there's a bit more to this game than I thought.

--Zero

[Graham Mitchell]

Wow, I should've checked gamefaqs long ago. I lose.

Well, that's more great mystery of life solved. Maybe now I can attempt to play this monster today (depending on how much I hate myself. I do love awful games, though.

Thanks so much for the responses, guys! It's a really obscure game, and I didn't think I was going to much out of posting the topic, so I am appreciative.

[Ze_ro]

Actually, I think I liked the game better before, when it was all misunderstood and confusing.... at least it had some mystique. Now all it is is just a crappy japanese game with a lame storyline and poor attempt at strategy. I guess some things are better left unknown...

--Zero