eBay Insanity Contest II: DEADLINE APPROACHES! 6PM EST

[digitalpress]

It's GO TIME.

Last year we had a blast manufacturing the wildest eBay auctions possible. About 20 people participated - the DP staff chose their 5 favorites, and those finalists went to a poll for everyone to vote. Moycon won the contest with his "adult" joystick and Keir came in a close second with "Combat Man", an action figure made out of an Atari 2600 Combat cart. Both were very creative entries, but others which bordered on the utterly disgusting or utterly absurd also scored many votes. Who will take the prize this year?

Those of you who have won contests here before know we don't skimp out, and this will be no exception. I can guarantee a haul that will impress even the most jaded gamer, one which will represent "the collector" in all of us, a cross-system, cross-era BOUNTY of prizes. I'm not going to reveal the contents until the entry deadline. Just be sure to get in on this.

RULES:
1) Submit an eBay auction with YOU as the seller. The goal is to have the most outrageous auction of all the applicants. You'll have some tough competition.
2) The auction does not necessarily have to a video game, but it should be video game related or intangibly connected (like the Fractalus underwear or the 80's air from last year).
3) You may submit multiple entries.
4) Once your auction is online, post a link to it HERE. This thread will stay online until the contest deadline, after which it will be moved to a web page on the DP site.
5) Your eBay auction must be online by 6pm EST Sunday, March 9th. At that time, all entries will be "frozen", and a web page will be set up with the actual auction links as well as PDF's (in case your auction gets cancelled).

HINTS:
-Don't start with a huge starting bid or a reserve! You'll get tagged with charges, and we're not partnering with eBay here, just using their tool as a contest platform.
-BE CREATIVE. Try something no one else would think of - or DARE.

Here are some of last year's enties saved for posterity, and also to get your creative juices flowing.

1980's Air
http://www.digitpress.com/archives/arc00137.pdf

Swordquest: Airworld Label
http://www.digitpress.com/archives/arc00138.pdf

Beat 'em and Eat 'em Joystick
http://www.digitpress.com/archives/arc00139.pdf

Combat Man Action Figure
http://www.digitpress.com/archives/arc00140.pdf

Rescue on Fractalus Underwear
http://www.digitpress.com/archives/arc00141.pdf

[Wavelflack]

I'll go first here:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011385033

Enjoy!

[maxlords]

Ok...here's mine! Hope everyone likes it!

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2163275839

I decided to add these all in one post..easier:

Entry #2: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=20389&item=3011703436

Entry #3 (collaborative entry with congobongo): http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011720130

[portnoyd]

Here's my entry. Ever been annoyed when someone uses one picture for 30 different auctions, and you just think "Is this one lazy bastard or what"?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011568157

dave

[zektor]

This is great! I'll have mine ready tomorrow! I like the Tetris hat :) And you got a bid as well :)

[Sothy]

Ok im in.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3404853029

This one goes out to my homie Aswald.

[Queen Of The Felines]

Ok im in.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3404853029

This one goes out to my homie Aswald.

That "Mother's Day" background is oddly appropriate. LOL

Mine will be up tomorrow.

Kristine

[Atar1G1rl]

Awwww damn! How am I supposed to compete with this?? :)

*wipes diet pepsi splatter off of the monitor*

Great stuff so far. Dave- genius!! And Sothy... *mouth hangs open* They are all great! I'll not fill this thread up with any more fodder until I get mine done at the very last minute. Impressive... Very impressive.

[briskbc]

OK, here's mine.


http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011630457

:)

[kainemaxwell]

Sothy's is my fav so far- it just throws its humor right at you and the usual Sothy charm.

Keep it up guys!

[orrimarrko]

MY GOD - first I read Portnoyd's which is funny as hell -

then I read Sothy's which is so funny I almost pissed myself!

Keep up the great work y'all. Thank God I'm the supervisor at work, otherwise my outburst might have been considered in bad taste...

[klimatron8]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1340&item=2163404012

ok here's my first of several entries. VideoGame connection would be ...well have you ever played Madden or NBA Live with a "friend" and been getting your ass kicked while being trash talked?

[Sniderman]

Whoa. Competition's gonna be TIGHT this year. I had some goofy concepts, but I gotta go back to the Funny Well if I hope to even place!

Will post my "not a chance in hell, but *I* think they're funny" auctions later today. Will try to come up with the Shit-Yourself-Humor-A-Bomb by week's end. Good stuff so far, gang!

[Alex Kidd]

I have a question:

Since we're REALLY posting these on eBay, what if someone actually bids on it. Or we get a strike agains't ourselves for trying to auction bogus items.. is this safe practice for a clean eBay record?

I wanna take part, but... I don't wanna get any strikes against myself.

Alex Kidd

[MankeyMan]

For some reason eBay won't let my dad register as a seller. It says that he needs to go back and put in another debit/credit card, but it just puts us to the screen with all of our filled in details.
Should I just register another account for the competition?

[portnoyd]

I have a question:

Since we're REALLY posting these on eBay, what if someone actually bids on it. Or we get a strike agains't ourselves for trying to auction bogus items.. is this safe practice for a clean eBay record?

I wanna take part, but... I don't wanna get any strikes against myself.

Alex Kidd

Well, I'm trying to sell that Bomberman II... seriously. The winner pays, the winner gets the cart. :) And can I say the cart is in perfect condition? Because it is. :D

Well, an option you may want to look into is setting your auction for preapproved bidders only. No one can bid, unless you give the OK. Then, simply never give anyone the OK. No auction winner, no bids, no feedback.

[zektor]

Mine's up:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=11703&item=2311363564

[kainemaxwell]

I have a question:

Since we're REALLY posting these on eBay, what if someone actually bids on it. Or we get a strike agains't ourselves for trying to auction bogus items.. is this safe practice for a clean eBay record?

I wanna take part, but... I don't wanna get any strikes against myself.

Alex Kidd

Well, I'm trying to sell that Bomberman II... seriously. The winner pays, the winner gets the cart. :) And can I say the cart is in perfect condition? Because it is. :D

Well, an option you may want to look into is setting your auction for preapproved bidders only. No one can bid, unless you give the OK. Then, simply never give anyone the OK. No auction winner, no bids, no feedback.
And if someone bids on your foot? :P

[Sniderman]

preapproved bidders only.

Damn, I sell on ebay all the time, but I'll be buggered if I can find this option. Does it even exist anymore? Supply a link if there is one. Thanks.

[klimatron8]

ok here's my second entry.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2163419369

[maxlords]

I have a question:

Since we're REALLY posting these on eBay, what if someone actually bids on it. Or we get a strike agains't ourselves for trying to auction bogus items.. is this safe practice for a clean eBay record?

I wanna take part, but... I don't wanna get any strikes against myself.

Alex Kidd

Mine already has two bids. I have the hat and it IS for sale, so if someone actually wants to buy it, they're welcome to it.
By the way...ARE multiple entries allowed? I had a couple other ideas that I discarded cause I didn't think they were.

[Sniderman]

3) You may submit multiple entries.

Go nuts, Maxie. :D

[maxlords]

Doh! Didn't read the fine print!

[portnoyd]

preapproved bidders only.

Damn, I sell on ebay all the time, but I'll be buggered if I can find this option. Does it even exist anymore? Supply a link if there is one. Thanks.

Ok, so I've never done it, but a seller selling a grey NWC was able to do it, so I don't see why we wouldn't be able to as well.

I'll snoop around tonight for it.

dave

[Mayhem]

It's still there (I see it for certain high profile items) but it might have certain conditions. I've never used it so hence can't help out though. Sothy's entry btw is rather amusing LOL

[maxlords]

Entry#2 for me! : http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011703436

[chocobokick]

Portnoyd, can I buy that monkey mug please?! It is really cute!

[maxlords]

Entry # 3 for me! http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011720130

This is a joint entry for me and congobongo...just so everyone knows.

[Queen Of The Felines]

Here's my first...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=3528&item=3011728591&rd=1

Kristine

[portnoyd]

Second entry.... I call it "The Bastard Seller from Hell"....

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011731987

dave

[TripppsK]

I'm in, heres my link. :P


http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011739120

[gamergary]

Qof can i buy that stuff? :-D Ports and Sothys are the best so far imo.

[NvrMore]

Hell, it seems like fun..

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2915878298

[Queen Of The Felines]

Qof can i buy that stuff? :-D

Sure, if you don't mind receiving a box of crap. :)

Hell, I'll even give ya free shipping. ;)

Kristine

[Raedon]

hmm.. thought my idea was teh funney but after showing it to a friend.. I'm going to brainstorm some more x_x

[Queen Of The Felines]

Entry #2...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=11042&item=3011761529&rd=1

Kristine

[buttasuperb]

entry 1

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011774027

[Sothy]

I will only combine shipping if you happen to have a W in your last name, and even then, when I say "combine", I mean "multiply $15 times the amount of items you won, and subtract tree fitty ($3.50)".

AHAHAHA

Port you mind if I copy your entry for my standard everyday Ebay listings?

[portnoyd]

I will only combine shipping if you happen to have a W in your last name, and even then, when I say "combine", I mean "multiply $15 times the amount of items you won, and subtract tree fitty ($3.50)".

AHAHAHA

Port you mind if I copy your entry for my standard everyday Ebay listings?

Go right ahead! :-D Just wait to see if I get any hate mail from people who think those rules are real...

And FYI, Rule #9 is a real rule I got from a real seller O_O

dave

[brandver3]

Portnoyd has me so torn. The is the only Capcom Genny game i need, but i havn't taken Calcuals!!!!!!

my brain hurts......

[portnoyd]

Portnoyd has me so torn. The is the only Capcom Genny game i need, but i havn't taken Calcuals!!!!!!

my brain hurts......

Hehe, it won't sell (unless someone is really that crazy ;)), so afterwards, it's all yours. PM me with anything you want to trade, or I'll take a cash offer as well. It doesn't have the manual, FYI.

dave

[buttasuperb]

entry 1

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3011774027


http://www.neo-geo.com/ubb/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=18;t=007770

:rocker:

[brandver3]

I'm going to enter later today, but my vote goes to butta just because the thread that his auction sparked funnier the his aucton (which is funny by the way).

"...guess I won't even have a chance to win this possibly rare proto, collectable game piece!"

LOL LOL LOL LOL

EDIT- I had to bid, i would gladly pay 2 dollars to be the coolest kid in town!

[maxlords]

http://www.neo-geo.com/ubb/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=18;t=007770

:rocker:

He he! One of them mentioned my Tetris hat too! I feel so proud \^_^/

[Queen Of The Felines]

Oh yeah?

http://www.atariage.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=22057

Whoo, $10!!! LOL

Kristine

[portnoyd]

Mwhaha, first thread to my credit!

http://www.atariage.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=22073

dave

[oesiii]

Your royalty check is in the mail ;)

I thought yours was the funniest so far :)




Mwhaha, first thread to my credit!

http://www.atariage.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=22073

dave

[buttasuperb]

And another.

http://www.neo-geo.com/cgi-local/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=8;t=017617#000015

[EnemyZero]

Ok heres my entry, http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012010361 enjoy!

[klimatron8]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2163419369

I just got the following email on my auction. Apparently this guy liked my grip.

How much is shipping for this hand? Are the fingerprints on this hand good
enough to transplant to someone else who needs to change their fingerprints for
legal reasons?
--------------------


Question from: stlouisrams2002
Title of item: Video Game Hand
Seller: 99edge99
Starts: Mar-05-03 10:28:18 PST
Ends: Mar-12-03 10:28:18 PST
Price: Starts at $5.00



Oh well, guess I'm off to the hardware store to look for a saw!
(The things I do for DP..)

[digitalpress]

THESE are TERRIFIC entries so far! Very creative.

Still about two days to get your entry in.

FYI, on Sunday night when the entry period closes:
1) a web page will be set up with all of the entries.
2) there will be a link to your auction and to an archived PDF of the auction just in case eBay closes you down (so far I've got every one of these backed up).
3) you will have the opportunity to start your own thread about your auction, where you can post emails you may have received, other forums or sites mentioning your auction, or even what inspired you. This may help get you some votes.

After about a week, I'll open up a poll and voting will begin.

Game on!

[NvrMore]

What happens if ebay takes down your auction before the deadline?

Entry #2
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012027642

Entry #3
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012025129

I hope the good chaps at ebay have a good sense of humor..

[buttasuperb]

and again. pretty soon this will be on CNN. LOL

http://www.neo-geo.com/ubb/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=18;t=007792

[zektor]

I actually got an email from a user for mine asking me if I would please include the bread. Bahaha!

[stonecutter]

that was my question also Nvrmore. M y submission will be posted soon. Maybe tonight if I get a chance to finalize it. I am also seeking advice from my Legal Dept...... :-)

[mcgrail0007@netzero.net]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2163419369

I just got the following email on my auction. Apparently this guy liked my grip.

How much is shipping for this hand? Are the fingerprints on this hand good
enough to transplant to someone else who needs to change their fingerprints for
legal reasons?
--------------------


Question from: stlouisrams2002
Title of item: Video Game Hand
Seller: 99edge99
Starts: Mar-05-03 10:28:18 PST
Ends: Mar-12-03 10:28:18 PST
Price: Starts at $5.00



Oh well, guess I'm off to the hardware store to look for a saw!
(The things I do for DP..)

I was just joking.! I saw it first on DP. I hope I didn't scare you. I couldn't pass it up. Your email response killed me. I still can't stop laughing. Here was his response:

Are you crazy? It's just a joke. Part of a contest entry at digitalpress.com
I'm not really going to cut off my hand. Please do not bid.

[stonecutter]

So did you bid or not lol

[zektor]

ENTRY #2:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=3617&item=3012043618

[Arcade Antics]

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL


<------- is crying from laughter.

Nice work there gang!

[dan2357]

Ok I got mine up .
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012079556

[TripppsK]

OK all, here is my Entry #2:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012111340

[punkoffgirl]

Oh yeah, well I have TEH BEST IDEAR EVAR!!!1111!!1!!!

I just have to tie up a few loose ends on it first before I put it up.

[klimatron8]

Here's some chatter about my "video game hand" from the AtariAge forums:

http://www.atariage.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=22120

[zektor]

ENTRY #3:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=27182&item=3012150792

The dyslexic auction!

[brandver3]

MY first entry of a planned 5.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012193779

EDIT:

Here's #2. Not supper funny, but at least good for a smile :)

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012195227

[digitalpress]

MY first entry of a planned 5.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012193779

Dude, aren't you getting killed with eBay fees on this? I don't know if you're alright with it but be careful with the starting bids and reserves - this contest isn't exactly sanctioned by eBay, they'll charge you like any other auction!

[brandver3]

The Fee was 3.25. And this auction will never sell, so no worries.

[digitalpress]

FYI all: up to right now I've got every entry backed up to a PDF file, no worries!

[stonecutter]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012210846

Hope you get a charge out of this!

Text in my auction did not get formatted properly, I pasted from a Notepad document as I was working on the text, and the paragraphs are not there. Sorry about that doesn't look how I intended.

[DDCecil]

Here's mine:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012223858

[chocobokick]

Who wants to go to the bathroom with Mario?
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=37637&item=2311864906&rd=1

[buttasuperb]

entry 2

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012262925


oh, and choco u r funnay!!!!111!!!11!1!1

[brandver3]

Entry #3


http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012263363

And to quell what is going to be asked a million times. NO, it is not REALLY for sale. I will cancel EVERY BID!!!!!!!!

By the end of the auction at least :D

[buttasuperb]

nice, you should see how high that gets, hehe.

[nesman85]

here's mine:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3012267593