This was just posted to the local craigslist... I got a seriously good laugh and thought it was too good not to share:

Arcade and Pinball Investment Oppotunity - $1 (Washington, DC)

Classic machines are appreciating in value. Use this hurting economy as a chance to invest!

KISS pinball machine - Backglass has crack and artwork on table needs restoration. $2,800 FIRM!

Asteroids - Not the original cabinet. Was a Donkey Kong, then a Tetris, then someone took the guts of an Asteroids (monitor, PCB, control panel) and shoved it in there. But, it's still a classic. Painted bright green. Not working. $1700

Ms.Pac-Man - This sat outside for 5 weeks underneath a gutter drain. No boards, but monitor is there. No monitor glass. Buy a new PCB, control panel, monitor glass (aforementioned), wiring harness, some new particle board, and you'll have a working if not pretty classic. $1895

Arkanoid - In an old Zaxxon cabinet. Working, but needs new capacitors on the monitor (wavy image). Water damage at bottom and on sides. This thing was earning $1.25 per week at the last location, so you're looking at a potential gold mine. $1900

Q*Bert - No PCB, no monitor, no control panel, no power supply, no marquee, no wiring harness. Works. $1500

Altered Beast - Fully working. A golden age classic (in a Joust cabinet). Serious offers over $2000 only, please

Street Fighter II - Cigarette burns on control panel. Very dirty. Has been in local auction warehouse for three months, and hasn't sold yet. Power cord cut. Monitor has Frogger burn-in. All fighting games are worth big $$$$. $2195

Ironman Stewart's Off Road - This machine weighs next to a ton. You'll need at least four people to move it out of my basement, because I won't help you. Steering wheels don't work. Popular at parties, but not social gatherings. $1899

Multiple game machine - in a Dragon's Lair cabinet. With a Pentium II computer, 15" flat screen monitor, arcade-style (sorta) joystick set inside a wooden drawer, power strip at bottom of cabinet, and a paper "My Home Arkade Matchine" marquee that took at least 45 minutes and Paintshop to make. Plays thousands of games, but sometimes you have to turn your head sideways `cause the monitor doesn't rotate. Uses MAME and Windows Millennium Edition. $3800

Donkey Kong - Pristine classic! ALL ORIGINAL! New repro control panel, new repro monitor glass, repro marquee, repro side art, new paint on cabinet, new modern joystick installed, no coin mechs (free play), new JAMMA Donkey Kong board installed. ALL ORIGINAL! $2395

Tempest - In the rare mini/cabaret cabinet. Game is in beautiful shape, with intact wood grain and no damage whatsoever. The original vector monitor, control panel, and PCB were also in phenomenal shape when I got the game, but the good news is that I've already put in a new piece of sheet metal and new controls on the panel, installed a raster monitor, and UPGRADED the game with a 48-1 PCB! All the hard work is done. $2495.

Prices are firm - I don't haggle. Any machine made from 1978 onward is still a potential earner; therefore, it is worth its original selling price (but usually more). I shop out all working machines from top to bottom with Windex and paper towels before sale.