The Stupidest Games You've Ever Played

[jhm1987]

OK I just recently played Shaq-Fu. Has anybody else played this piece of crap called a game.There is one good thing about this game though, it didn't abduct my cat. Oh yea one more thing good about it...........wait.....nope that was something else I was thinking about.

[MegaDrive20XX]

Rise of the Robots....I rest my case...

oh and not to mention "Cosmic Carnage" on 32X....*shivers*

[punkoffgirl]

Let's move this one on over to the gaming forum, shall we?

[Jibbajaba]

Back to the Future for NES, hands down. It is a HORRIBLE game. And it has basically nothing to do with the movie.

Chris

[soniko_karuto]

Back to the Future for NES, hands down. It is a HORRIBLE game. And it has basically nothing to do with the movie.

Chris

so IT IS a game after all.

i used it as a doorstop.

[Nez]

Jaws (nes) Bad just bad. That and Razor FreestyleScooter.


FREESTYLE SCOOTER! how lame is that!?

[scooterb23]

/me starts dancing around randomly...

Freestyle...scooter...oh never mind.

Now that was lame.

I'd have to say any stealth game...pick one...say...Metal Gear Solid. I don't think sitting still and aviding conflict is a very fun game. And they don't really give you the option to go in guns blazing successfully.

[BHvrd]

I agree with previous mentioned games except back to the future, i enjoyed that one.

Other vomit inducing games:

Kether on CD-i
Hell on 3do
Cybermorph on jaguar

[Jibbajaba]

I agree with previous mentioned games except back to the future, i enjoyed that one.

Other vomit inducing games:

Kether on CD-i
Hell on 3do
Cybermorph on jaguar

Cybermorph SUCKS!!!!! And the funny thing is that when they had the Jaguar set up at "The Good Guys" near my house when it came out, they had it running that game. Sure it was the pack-in game, but it didn't make me want the system.

Chris

[suppafly]

Crazy taxi. Stupid game. I got bored after 10 minutes...

[soniko_karuto]

Crazy taxi. Stupid game. I got bored after 10 minutes...

crazy taxi ain't bad. it's just your taste.

if you don't like crazy taxi then i don't like final fantasy 7. :angry:

[LiquidX01]

Beavis and ButtHead on the Genesis.

Come on, it dont get much more stupider than that.

[max 330 mega]

hmm.. where to begin.

kingdoms: the far reaches for 3DO
the hunt for red october for NES
contra: legacy of war for saturn
battlemaster for genesis
squeezebox for atari 2600
any game like dragons lair
hyperzone for SNES
cosmic carnage for 32X
and the worst game of all time, My Hero for SMS

yea those are some real shit piles.

[motley6]

Conan for NES

[Cauterize]

I think Flintstones on the Master System wins the all round crappiest game ever award! Just try that first level, i know you will hate it!

[Berty]

Grand Theft Auto 3, Grand Theft Auto Vice City
If you took away the violence then what is left?

Primal Rage was also fairly crappy, but Shaq Fu is the icing on the cake

[jdc]

Metal Gear Solid for the PSX is the "stupidest" game that I've EVER experienced and most likely ever will again. What the hell was Hideo Kojima thinking?!?!?!

You've got this awesome game....with this guy named Snake. You spend all of your time being as stealthy as humanly possible....sneaking here, sneaking there....being all covert. Snake is one cool, calm, level-headed guy.

Then all of a sudden....his brains go out the fuckin' window. He walks into a warehouse. There's this badass chick...Sniper Wolf. She's up high on a catwalk....with a sniper rifle, drawing a bead on Snake. So what does hero boy do? Lays down prone in the MIDDLE OF THE FREAKIN' FLOOR, WITH NO COVER WHATSOEVER......and attempts to take her out. AND he's got a case of "the shakes"!! "Gee bitch, let's see you try and take me out NOW!!!"

So much for stealth. At that point all of the believability and immersion of the game abruptly ended. I took the disc out of the PSX and vowed never to play a Metal Gear game again.

[EnemyZero]

Can we say Link: The Faces of Evil on CD-I? :) good

[fishsandwich]

Anyone play ALF on the Master System? No? Keep it that way.

[Maddrox]

porkys for 2600 was pretty bad...

[Cauterize]

Metal Gear Solid for the PSX is the "stupidest" game that I've EVER experienced and most likely ever will again. What the hell was Hideo Kojima thinking?!?!?!

You've got this awesome game....with this guy named Snake. You spend all of your time being as stealthy as humanly possible....sneaking here, sneaking there....being all covert. Snake is one cool, calm, level-headed guy.

Then all of a sudden....his brains go out the fuckin' window. He walks into a warehouse. There's this badass chick...Sniper Wolf. She's up high on a catwalk....with a sniper rifle, drawing a bead on Snake. So what does hero boy do? Lays down prone in the MIDDLE OF THE FREAKIN' FLOOR, WITH NO COVER WHATSOEVER......and attempts to take her out. AND he's got a case of "the shakes"!! "Gee bitch, let's see you try and take me out NOW!!!"

So much for stealth. At that point all of the believability and immersion of the game abruptly ended. I took the disc out of the PSX and vowed never to play a Metal Gear game again.


hahahaha i love MGS, but that it classic!

[sabre2922]

cyberspeed on PSX and.....
battletoads on NES because of the insane controller throwing difficulty! at least it was back in the day ;)

[rbudrick]

porkys for 2600 was pretty bad...


Think so? For the 2600, it's pretty good, in my book. Plus, it's one of the few VCS games that is beatable and has an ending/objective (Pitfall 2 is the only other that immediately comes to mind...well I guess Pitfall 1 also...I guess Adventure too).

Also, it did it's best to keep some of the movie plot there...basic as the 2600 is. For the time it wasn't bad at all, imo.

-Rob

[Rogmeister]

Michael Jordan in "Chaos in the Windy City"! If I'm going after some bad guys, I want to make sure I have enough basketballs to use as weapons! LOL

[chadtower]

Final Fantasy X

What a dumbass piece of crap. I want my 5 hours back.

[tritium]

For the record: I like Jaws[nes] I like Crazy Taxi[DC/GC/PS2] I like GTA/GTA2

I dislike GTA 3. I can't figure out what Im supposed to do. Just run around and get lost.

-Tritium

[Famidrive-16]

Adventures of Soccer Kid... not Marko, but the french one.

For the bazillion systems it was released for.

[Rogmeister]

Here's another...Super Baseball Simulator 1.000...where you can throw 160 MPH fastballs...which isn't bad but there's other things...split into about 5 guys pitching the ball at the same time, throw fireballs or other such things, I can't remember all the weird "powers" you have in this game. It's like the Justice League got together for some diamond action! Come to think of it, I remember the Fantastic Four playing a game in their comic many years ago O_O

[Johnny Black]

Personally, I like Jaws. And how could anyone not like Crazy Taxi. That's a great game. I also like the GTA games.

What I'm surprised at is the fact that nobody's mentioned Taboo for the NES. That was the shittiest excuse for a "game" ever made.

Good call on Rise of the Robots. That game was pretty horrible. Shaq Fu is, of course, one that will always be remembered as one of the shittiest ever. I actually have the game. Just to be able to say "Hey, I have Shaq Fu, one of the shittiest video games ever made."

[sabre2922]

I have to second Final Fantasy X BIG dissapointment for me but that seems to happen every other FF or so just like 7 was good then 8 sucked then 9 was great IMOA so I guess its par for course :roll:

[vintagegamecrazy]

Kendo Rage for the SNES, dumb plot, cheesy graphics and repetivite gameplay.

[NESaholic]

I'd have to say Action 52 for the nes, what a bunch of crap that is, all games are not interesting at all. -_-

[aaron7]

Trolls for the NES by AVE!!! Horrible boring game!!

[Johnny Black]

I thought Kendo Rage was great, if not just for the hilarity of the game.

There's a stinker I played recently for the Genny called The Immortal. That game sucked ungodly amounts of ass.

[jhm1987]

Hey I happen to like all of the GTAs, Kendo Rage, and of course Crazy Taxi. How could anybody not like Crazy Taxi????

[charitycasegreg]

Beavis and ButtHead on the Genesis.

Come on, it dont get much more stupider than that.

Come on, I played that when I was in 4th grade and thought it was great. I hate the game DAsh Galexy in the alien asylum for nes. Playing it just makes me want to end my life, or never play an older game again.

[RJ]

Stay far away from Hellboy for Playstation. Hopefully they'll make a decent one based on the movie, which rocked.

Metal Gear Solid really turned me off, too- especially the "legendary" boss battle against Psycho Mantis. Having/being told to switch controller ports right in the middle of it really ruined it for me. I mean, come on- really now, how dumb is that?

Plus, I'm SURE I had a Silent Hill (Konami) save on the mem card & he never acknowledged it!

[atomicthumbs]

Final Fantasy X

What a dumbass piece of crap. I want my 5 hours back.

5 Hours huh? I guess you skipped past the storyline.



Or, used a gameshark (damn random battles).

[atomicthumbs]

As far as my vote goes... I'd have to say...


Y'know. I just can't think of one. Sure, there are PLENTY of BAD games out there (that have been beaten to DEATH)... But I just can't really think of any games I would call stupid. There are tons that don't make any sense (especially on older platforms) but most have some seriously good gameplay, which makes up for it.

Yeah, someone mentioned MGS and the whole Sniper Wolf thing... But that was a fun and challenging level. Might as well make fun of Contra then.


Sitting here, the best I can think of is Mighty Morphin Power Rangers for Sega CD.... Stupid game, yet I enjoyed it and I still have my $2.99 Toys R' Us dump bin copy.

Oh well... If I think of one, I'll be sure and post it.

[norkusa]

There is a game on the Action 52 cart for Genesis called Sunday Drive. All you do is drive down a 4-lane highway. There is no scoring or action whatsoever...you just drive slowly down the highway. Wait, I think you can use your car horn though, so there is *some* action.

Dumbest game I've ever played.

[Wavelflack]

Perhaps Sneak n' Peek.

[Britboy]

Blitzball

[Gapporin]

I hate the game DAsh Galexy in the alien asylum for nes.

That's been at least two people on this board who didn't like this game. I'm the third. Don't ever play this game, folks. Just say no.


Anyone play ALF on the Master System? No? Keep it that way.

Seconded. The only game I've ever played that lets you buy an item that makes you start the game over. Seriously.


and the worst game of all time, My Hero for SMS

Please don't say that. My Hero is one of my all-time favorite arcade games, and I haven't had the chance to play the SMS conversion yet...

[Avatard]

Well, stupidest for obsurdness (but still fun to play) was Moonwalker for the Genisis.

Stupidest for wasting my time as a kid was...
Hylde (NES) What was that about? No swinging swords?
Rambo (NES) Uh...what am I supposed to do?
Time Lord (NES) Don't get me started on this one.
Super Godzila (SNES) Yawn, another fighter.
Marble Madness (NES) Come on, multiplayer never makes it past the 1st lvl. Bad design.
Mr. Mosquito. (PSX) Pressure points on peoples crotches? WTH!
Dance Aerobics (NES) Yes...I've played it........I lost, that slut.
Resident Evil: Zero Hour (GCN) Yea, had to sit through the intro 8+ times and never could figure out how to save it. Forget that. Swinging my dagger THROUGH THE ZOMBIE, I saw it, and it still doesn't hurt it.
Fighting Golf (NES) I couldn't wait to get home to play this, what a missleading title! GRRRR.

Oh the horror.

*Edit* I must add Bigfoot (NES) for making my thumbs BLEED.

[8bitnes]

I have to defend Hydlide on NES. I really loved that game as a 12 year old. I finally took the time to beat it again last year even!

Another on here to defend is Super Baseball Simulator 1.000. At least it had a save battery and you could play a season. It beats the heck out of Bases Loaded for sure. Who cares if its realistic, it was fun. For the same reason, MLB Slugfest is good.

I can't believe no one has brought up ET for 2600.

I think we all can ramble off 20+ games we hate and there will likely be a defender of each out there.

[Habeeb Hamusta]

Grand Theft Auto 3, Grand Theft Auto Vice City
If you took away the violence then what is left?

Primal Rage was also fairly crappy, but Shaq Fu is the icing on the cake

I agree but I had a little fun with Primal Rage. Piss off GTA.

[8bitnes]

Here's another for the trash bin ... Taboo: The Sixth Sense for NES.

[ldkspardante]

Some games I think are very crappy:

Link games on CD-I
Onimusha 3 (Don't get me started)
Here comes Mr. Domino for PSX (lol)

Sorry, that's all I can make out in this massive blurred group of crappy game names in my mind.

[ldkspardante]

Oh, and about ET, it's just understood. It doesn't even have to be mentioned.

[atomicthumbs]

Stupidest for wasting my time as a kid was...

Mr. Mosquito. (PSX) Pressure points on peoples crotches? WTH!



Oh, COME ON!!! What a great and original game?! You got somethin' against crotches, boy?!

[digitalpress]

Man, some people just don't know how to read a topic.

He said STUPIDEST. Not WORST. Maybe they're the same to you, but I'm seeing people actually mention their choices as the worst games and that's just off-topic. Get with the program!

Here's one.

NINJA GOLF (Atari, for Atari 7800). Hey, it really isn't a BAD game, but it's really stupid. I guess maybe the strange combination of fighting to get to your ball so you could hit it again seemed like a "hit" to someone, but damn, you lose IQ points the moment you put the game in the slot.

[atomicthumbs]

Okay... The BEST of the REALLY STUPID mini-games from Pokemon Stadium 1 & 2!!!


- Streaming Stampede
- ClearCut Challenge
- Clefairy Says
- Ekans' Hoop Hurl
- Furret's Frolic

Three Best Stupid Mini-Games

3 - Magicarp Splash
2 - Dig! Dig! Dig!
1 - Sushi Go-Round





Don't even get me started on Wario Ware, inc. Too much great stupid stuff.

[atomicthumbs]

http://www.digitpress.com/images/ezboard/avatar-otto.gif I'm glad to see ol' blue ball back again...

...

Never thought I'd say that.

[kirin jensen]

actually the STUPIDEST games have yet to be created, but here's a few ideas to get you started creating them:

You! Your opponent! An all out shopping spree through the Mall of America followed by a no-holds-barred steel cage match TO THE DEATH!!! It's MALL BRAWL!
Look! What a pretty princess! Dress her! Choose her hairstyle! Then put her in the ring for the catfight of her pretty princess life! Pretty Princess Slap Fight 3000!
or how about
Choose from forty different pornstars including Jenna Jameson, classic Seka, and Traci Lords! No weapons, but lots of special equipment! All-out pimp-slapping, tongue-kissing, booty-shaking action! No fatalities, but you won't care! It's PORNO KOMBAT!!!! REmember the guy from the Mortal Kombat tv ads? CAn't you just see him standing in the middle of the street yelling "PORNO KOMBAT!!!!"?

[Fuyukaze]

Spin the bottle at a nursing home.......wait...you ment video games didnt you?

uh, sorry, that would go to.....narc on the nes...

im going to hide back under my rock now

[racecar]

don't confuse these games are fun !! but they are stupid(pointless or make you spend more$$/take away large portion of your time)
state of emergency
gta series
some rpgs(crappy long ones)
mario party series (n64)(shit i swear that game has made me broke(analog) more then 7+ n64 controllers( and they cost a fortune for me to replace !!
the list goes on ... also games made off movies are pretty pointless too !!

[Dr. Morbis]

My pick for stupidest game: Bad Dudes. The premise: the President has been kidnapped by ninjas. Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the President?

Runner up goes to Bad Street Brawler. That game is incredibly retarded. One of the first insights the game dispenses on the player is "never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you" or something like that.

[atomicthumbs]

My pick for stupidest game: Bad Dudes. The premise: the President has been kidnapped by ninjas. Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the President?



You gotta love it when your President/Girlfriend/Child gets kidnapped by ninjas...

[greedostick]

cyberspeed on PSX and.....
battletoads on NES because of the insane controller throwing difficulty! at least it was back in the day ;)

Wait a minute!!
I know you just didn't diss Battletoads!! :angry:
Battletoads is a piece of classic gaming history!!

OK, here is a list of some real shitty games i doubt anyone will like.

carmageddon
muppets for nes
who framed roger rabbit nes
raid on bungiling bay nes
atari circus
primal rage every system
burning fight neo geo
legend of success joe (actually famous for being total garbage, neo geo)
darius alpha pc engine
crime fighters JAMMA

99% of every sega cd game
99% of every 32x game
97% of every 3DO game
99% of every cdi game
100% of every playdia game
98% of every pcfx game
100% of every atari jaguar and jaguar cd game

when it comes to crap, the sega genesis is king. i could name hundreds of horrid genesis games. but i have to give it credit, it has alot of good games also, mainly shining force and my favorite game ever Landstalker: the treasures of king nole.

budakon
power monger
shaq fu
brutal paws of fury
light crusader
powerball
dark castle

i'm just gonna stop now.

[atomicthumbs]

OK, here is a list of some real shitty games i doubt anyone will like.


raid on bungiling bay nes


That's one of my favorite NES games!!! I have some very fond memories of playing that game as a kid... That, and some very fond memories of playing it last month.

[LAGO]

Well if your looking for stupid I'd go with DOA Extreme beach volleyball for the x-box. Play volleyball by clothes ... translates too work your ass off and watch a girl by clothes with the money you earn ... and this is partly what my girlfriend is for, or that's what i'm told anyway.

[RJ]

greedostick wrote:
raid on bungiling bay nes

Wasnt that (or a version thereof) Will Wright's first game he ever programmed?

[NeoVenom]

I have to say ET for Atari, Shaq-Fu for any system that has it, and Link Adventure games for CD-I (which is by far the worse). Another stupid game is Toys for SNES. I brought it in a garage sale and I'm like "wtf" when I played the game.

[SegaAges]

well i see i have much different taste in games than some of you.

a bunch of you guys said you didn't like freestyle scooter. i love freestyle scooter. the game is really fun.

somebody said some of the gta games

i actually do not like final fantasy games. the only 1 i own is ffx, and that was for the graphics and the fact that it was super easy. i find rpg's very boring and pretty much don't play them or own them. i do own pokemon games, but those are super easy, and I don't consider them true rpg's.

somebody said it as a joke, but i am being real, i do not like final fantasy 7. man, what is up with the stupid random battkes in rpg's. i think if they want it to be like those crazy evil monsters are everywhere and you may have to battle them, you should be able to at least see them moving on your screen so that you can avoid them it you want. how in the hell can it be random to fight something 20 times your size that doesn't move at all, some plant looking thing or something. what, it magically flies and lands right in front of you and it somehow has a magical spell that makes it so that you have to fight it? i can understand that back in the day it would be hard to put all of the characters on the screen for you to avoid, but they still do it today. well, the turn based rpg's i play do it. all of the real time ones i have played do not do it. if these can do it, why in the hell are there still random battles. everybody is all up on rpg's nuts, but i don't like them. i tried playing chrono cross, and hated the game. i have tried final fantasy legends (gb), final fantasy 7, final fantasy 8, final fantasy 10, and hated them all except for 10 because it was easy and very pretty.

[/quote]

[greedostick]

random battles are part of rpg's. if you don't have random battles then it is called a action rpg. zelda, landstalker, neutopia 1 and 2, magicoal, y's book 1 and 2, secret of mana, popful mail, and crusader of centy are all action rpg's. which is my personal favorite genre of games. i find action rpg's to be more exciting, although i do like a nice rpg. if you have a genesis go buy landstalker, if you have a snes go buy secret of mana. that is about as good as they get.

when it comes to rpg's either you just don't like them, or you just started playing them at the wrong time. odds are if you don't like to read then you won't like a rpg, because there basically a interactive book.

you should go spend $40 and go get final fantasy anthology and chronicles for ps1. if you don't like final fantasy 4 and 6 or chrono trigger i suggest you never buy a rpg again. seriously, if you can't appreciate those games you have no business playing any rpg. if you decide you like them, then maybe you will understand more games like final fantasy 7, grandia, phantasy star, and other great rpg's.

out of all the games you said you played they basically all sucked. everyone know final fantasy went downhill from 8 and up. some even claim 7 sucks, but if was not for that one game we would still be importing rpg's we couldn't read. that one game is responsible for the rpg boom in america.

anyway, just go buy landstalker and secret of mana. there both better than any rpg.

[Jorpho]

REmember the guy from the Mortal Kombat tv ads? CAn't you just see him standing in the middle of the street yelling "PORNO KOMBAT!!!!"?

Oh my. It's true. It's just so true.

[cr0n0]

DEADLY TOWERS for the NES.

Hmm :/ ...let's see, I am a prince of some type with armor and a sword that seems to petrude from my abdomen at sheer will X_x , and I must go into a castle full of little blobs that somehow pierce my armor and proceed to give me the spanking of a lifetime. But the programmers threw in a BONUS!! :evil: They decided it would be cool if your character flew back a few feet after being hit by anything, blobs, bats, worms...the wind. YET, there is more. :eek 2: Let's send the player into invicible portals that send our (hero? O_O ) into another dimension full of...blobs, bats, worms and the occasional EVIL flame on the ground that would follow you and THROW you into the next room, where his next of kin, the flying flame is there to greet you, and knock you into the next room to meet... :angry:
This is one of the first games I saw enemies actually perform combo hits on you and before you knew it you were dead :bullshit: :grrr:
I will stop here and spare you all the pain that I have endured. :( Forgive me y'all. Crap, even my cat started to cry. :oops:

[Zing]

Milon's Secret Castle and Bubble Bath Babes.

[qbertandernie]

wait..

i think someone said a bad thing about circus atari.

did you live when the atari was around?

i happen to like circus atari. it fits with the ataris ability to entertain with basic games.

ok, back to the discussion already in progress..

[FlufflePuff]

Menace Beach is a pretty stupid game. Skateboard around, throwing crap and random people, while your gf's cloths rot off and she swears at you. If my gf said half the crap of the gf in Menace Beach I'd leave her in that dungeon and go impress some new girls with my mad Menace Beach skateboarding skills.

[Bluteg]

Home Alone 2 for SNES comes to mind... Why oh why do the self-propelled vacums eat your head? What did that friggin' kid do that was so bad to have inanimate objects come to life just to kill him.

Almost all of the crappy 3rd party liscensed GBC/GBA games. I mean come on decent games cannot be made in 24 hours.

AND... *prepares to duck flames* Halo's single player! Let's rip off Half-Life and add a variation in atmosphere as boring as only Wolfenstien 3-D. Remember in Wolf 3-D how all you see is the same blue walls? That's basically how this game feels to me, and horrible linear level design is not all! Can you say repetitve? It's like the programmers got lazy and copy and pasted certain areas over and over just to add length. The whole game follows the same pattern max out on ammo, go through 4-5 NEARLY IDENTICAL areas with endless waves of the same boring enemies. Then you nearly run out of ammo only to find more at the last second; rinse and repeat. Throw in a cut scene every few rinse and repeats and thats the game. Yes, I played through the whole agonizing thing hoping it would get better but it didn't.

[vulcanjedi]

Greetings Programs.

When it comes to bad games there are too many to count going back to the 2600 days. After all that's what caused the crash. But there are some games that were horrid and a waste of $25 then that are more fun to play now. Like Pacman and ET. But data age games like sssnake and airlock are awful even today.

I would love to hear stories about how people forced their way through a bad game just to say they did.

Like Laser Blast for the 2600. I actually made it once in a mind numbing 2 or 3 hours to break the 100,000 score to get the patch. But then totally forgot to grab a camera to take a picture as I couldn't stop my eyes from twitching to the right...

End of line.

[Mad Chemist]

random battles are part of rpg's. if you don't have random battles then it is called a action rpg.

Since when are random battles necessary for RPGs? Or are the Grandia series, Star Ocean 3, etc. not really RPGs? :)

Anyway, how about 'Final Approach" for the Atari 2600. You play the role of an air traffic controller trying to guide planes in to land. And this is supposed to be a fun game. Sheesh.

And then there's "Tax Avoiders" ... whch is just weird.

[Xantan the Foul]

I also loved Jaws... it's simplicity was it's major draw.

[Lady Jaye]

Strawberry Shortcake Match-Ups on the Atari 2600 (see DP #60 for a review). Now, that was a stupid game. Not much in terms of replay value, although trying to match up the character as the sun timer goes by can be a challenge... when you're 4 and can't read.

The only redeeming quality for this game is that, graphically, it doesn't look too bad at all. Otherwise, it was a far from stellar effort from Parker Bros.

http://www.digitpress.com/dpsightz/atari2600/strawberryshortcake.gif