Over the weekend I did something I’ve been meaning to do for a long time; play around with some of those old VCS cartridges that I’ve never gotten around to trying out. Most of us are familiar with the popular (“good”) VCS carts, have given the legendary “bad” ones a look, and thanks to the magic of emulation we’ve even gotten to know the rare ones. But that leaves out a lot of somewhat hard to find titles that just kind of fade into the woodgrain, so to speak. So for a while I have wondered…what IS Cross Force? Survival Run? Tapeworm?
First it is worth mentioning that the Atari VCS and its games are incredibly reliable. Almost every one of these cartridges worked instantly, after not being played for who knows how many years.
OK the games:
Spitfire Attack – one of those Milton Bradley games that came packed with a special controller. I was never very interested in those controllers but I am now after playing Spitfire Attack, which is the most convincing “flight sim” style game on the VCS (yes better than Zaxxon and Radar Lock).
Bank Heist – a pretty good Pac Man style maze game that reminds me a bit of the arcade game “Thief” (it even has Thief’s siren sound down to a T). The cars look exactly like modern day SUVs…pretty weird.
Cosmic Commuter – starts out like Lunar Lander then changes to a boring Defender clone where you shoot yellow squares. The fuel indicator effect is cool but I could swear I’ve seen it in another VCS game.
Porky’s – a horrible mess of a game that actually incorporates a pole vaulting sequence. One of the worst games on the VCS.
Survival Run –MB game in which you shoot white squares with a crosshair. The white squares eventually turn into yellow blobs. I think you’re supposed to be flying through a tunnel. Not nearly as good as Spitfire Attack.
Planet Patrol – generic side scrolling shooter. Has a day to night progression like Enduro. And you refuel occasionally which I guess is kinda cool.
Fast Food - “food” flies around the screen and you may eat everything except the purple pickles. If you eat too many purple pickles you will see text reading “BURP”. When you complete a level text reads “YOU’RE GETTING FATTER” which is apparently a good thing. The graphics of the fast food are well done and you will easily tell the difference between a hamburger and a milkshake. The text looks rather nice for a VCS game.
Revenge of the Beefsteak Tomatoes – shoot stuff in this boring and ugly game. Green things shoot at you from the bottom and you cannot shoot them back. I HATE THAT. The closest thing to this that you may have played before is Activision’s Plaque Attack. What the thing is you are supposed to be shooting with I have no idea.
The Earth Dies Screaming – nice looking “crosshairs” game. I had a Vic 20 game that was exactly like this one but I can’t think of the name of it for the life of me.
Deadly Duck – lame Space Invaders style game in which some things drop obstacles that hinder your movement. In the second level insects of some kind appear and make the game worse. Your duck is not very deadly, and it takes forever to destroy the last alien in a wave. Weak. Graphics are decent.
Cosmic Creeps – starts out with a Frogger like sequence in which your skater dude must reach the top of the screen, then turns into a typical shoot the aliens game. Very nice graphics, especially the space ship at the top! Forgettable otherwise.
Tapeworm – this is that game I swear I’ve played before where you pick up new pieces of your “snake” until it becomes hard to manage. I think I played it on a Mac or something, and it’s often featured on those cheap Tetris handhelds. Actually a pretty addicting game, but very poor graphics.
Gremlins- lousy game that is part Kaboom, part shooter, and all frustrating. Very poor quality for a first party title. Really should have been a paddle game, but I guess then it would have been too much like Kaboom to keep Atari out of court with Activision.
Sub Scan – you are in a boat at the top of the screen and you drop bombs on the subs below. The bombs fall very slowly so you must time your shots accurately. Nice looking but very slooowww…needs aliens or something.
Cross Force – Shoot stuff on your Atari VCS, this time with a laser that crosses in between your cursors at the top and bottom of the screen. Are the graphics in this game supposed to be so jumpy? Maybe my cart is PAL…