Hilarious amazon.com VG reviews, part 1

[Kroogah]

Let me preface this by saying that I LOVE going through the reviews of video games at amazon.com looking for the most (unintentionally) hilarious reviews I can find. After seeing this one today, I just HAD to start a topic devoted to my pastime:

Virtua Fighter 4 for the PS2

"This is possibly the worest fighting game I've ever played. Woo Hoo it's hard to learn how to do moves, but even when you do learn the fighting still looks blocky and forced. The music is terrible, and your confined to a little boxed ring. The backrounds may look beautiful, but that doesn't matter you won't have a chance to fight in them. The characters are pathetic as well, but this brings up a bigger question. Why would any developer put wrestlers and boxers in a martial arts sim? I would like to see a true martial arts sim, where each fighter has a highly developled arsenal of moves based on real moves in real martial arts. Do yourself a favor and stay away from all of Sega's fighters. Yes, even Soul Caliber, it's garbage. Go and pick up any Tekken and watch the fluidity and grace in which the moves flow together, this is what simulated martial arts is all about."

Yes, we all hate wrestlers and boxers in martial arts sims. Good thing Tekken 4 doesn't have either of those. ^_^

And my personal favorite quote from this review:

Do yourself a favor and stay away from all of Sega's fighters. Yes, even Soul Caliber, it's garbage.

I shouldn't have to point out why this makes me crack up.

More to come.

[chadtower]

Well, the idiot clearly knows nothing about martial arts. There are elements of wrestling and boxing in any martial art. There's a reason they call things like Pride and UFC Mixed Martial Arts competitions. I mean come on, does a martial art get any purer than the Drunken Master?

[Arcade Antics]

And my personal favorite quote from this review:

Do yourself a favor and stay away from all of Sega's fighters. Yes, even Soul Caliber, it's garbage.

I shouldn't have to point out why this makes me crack up.

More to come.

It's because he spelled "Calibur" wrong, I just know it.

Maybe he thinks that Sega/Namco merger went through.

[Kroogah]

Def Jam Vendetta for PS2

Reviewer: hakeem from va
I thank xbox is better then every game sept not ps2 becuases ps2 been out longer xbox haves grate diles and better then a gamecube gameboyssp is grate.jjjjj

And right below that one:

Reviewer: A gamer from farmvill VA USA)
I just got A ps2 and its the best so far. but I like all of the systems exsept the cube. the ps2 plays both dvds ps1 games and ps2 games. no matter what people say about it I will always like
it the best xbox just can not be is good is the ps2.

Verily, Xbox doth possess grate diles.

[hezeuschrist]

Ugh, I get so pissed when i read those things... do people who write those things think that anyone gives a shit what they say? Just like those stupid lists too... I saw one that was called "WHY THE MUSIC YOU LIKE SUCKS, LISTEN TO THIS"

Humanity makes Baby Jesus cry. Humanity and the internet makes Baby Jesus give head to a sawed off shotgun.

[Quazick]

Can we ever forget the reviews of classic games on website more devoted to next-gen games?...

Here's my little mock...

"y0 this b teh brake down this game sux bcuz the grafx blow so dont wast ur tinme! by a xb0x! the grafx r00L!!!!!"

Yes I have seen a review very similar to that of FF2 for SNES.

Rock On!