TO: Members of forum, various lurkers and cretins
CC: Ms. Achika
SUBJ: Return of your server
Please be advised that the server which is commonly used as a communication channel between many of you reading this has been returned for your usage. The weekend's cruise around the isle of Antigua went a day longer than expected, and the executive personnel here at DP Industries Inc needed a backup computer to analyze the local weather patterns. No one likes to drink Cognac and dance with tanned island women at a yacht luau in the RAIN. These were simply preventative measures that had to be taken not so much for our safety but rather for our uninterrupted extreme pleasure.
I am certain this inconvenience was of little consequence to you but as part of my commitment to be a kindler, gentler CEO and corporate hub, I felt it necessary to share this explanation with you.
The executive board who accompanied me on this voyage also wish to thank you for the temporary use of this backup server. Had we not skirted a minor "kick up" in the Mediterranean, the roast pig and nude belly dancers would not have been nearly as enjoyable. Without the comfort of knowing that should our main computer break we would still have this reasonably efficient backup unit, we may have had some troublesome moments on the high seas.
Please resume whatever it is you do when you are here.