That's because there is no true standard. The premise you're on is a very good one though as to what the standard is. You even said "once upon a time" and " i think"
those are both illusions to what the standard is because to a degree there is.
It reminds me of when people say that stereotying is bad even though stereotypes are based on truth. It's that political incorrectness. You can't go ahead and label the person because you'll be the bad guy but in a sense that stereptype does exist.