Taboo is one of the most misunderstood cartridges on the NES.

Notice I didn't say "game," as its not a game. Taboo: the Sixth Sense is a tarot card reading program. This is where 99% of the reviews and criticism of this game on the internet get on my nerves, as they tend to be basically idiots who did zero research commenting on something they don't understand, judging it against expectations it was never designed to meet. In essence, complaining that Taboo isn't interactive and doesn't have much gameplay is like complaining that Adobe Photoshop won't walk your dog for you--what the hell were you even expecting?

I should note that yes, I believe in this stuff. No, that does not stop me from making fun of it sometimes, especially when every book on the subject of Tarot seems to have a different interpretation of what each card means, and that's before you get to what Joe Average would think--the most famously misrepresented, for example, is Death: every horror movie has a tarot reading where somebody gets this card and they take it literally, when in fact its usually supposed to mean a more metaphorical death--IE a major change in the course of your life. "The Lovers" similarily is misunderstood (though it can mean what you think at times) as is "the Fool" (who isn't a moron, simply an ignorant guy. The suits of the major arcana supposedly tell the story of his journey and enlightenment)

So back to Taboo.

The program starts by asking you your name, gender, and date of birth. It somehow uses this information to show you what card represents you. This isn't random, as I always get the knight of cups when I enter my info, even if I use a slightly different name (I've used both "Jimmy" and "James").

After shuffling, the cards are placed in a pattern known as the Celtic Cross. I'm not an expert, but basically each card in sequence represents things like where you are now, what happened in the past, what's going to happen, what people think of you, and what events are happening or about to happen that may affect you, ultimately leading up to a summation. This is another thing people don't quite get--I remember Seanbaby's review in particular taking each card on its own, at face value, which is not what you're supposed to do, but rather you're supposed to consider all the info you've been given.

After all that, you get a thing telling you your lucky numbers. This is one of the few things that annoys me as you have to pick your state, and my state didn't have a lottery at the time so its not represented here (I tend to pick a state immediately adjescent to mine).

.........

Now if you want to have some fun, read the manual. Taboo came with a thick (for an NES game) little booklet, and on each and every page Tradewest was desperate to remind you that this is just for fun, just a party game (which I can actually see that being true), and it won't really summon demons or devils or if it does, its totally not their fault, but yours for messing with intangible forces, you asshole.

Now, in all my years of using Taboo, I have never seen it manifest anything paranormal. Well... actually I have noticed that sometimes when the cards are arranged on the cross, one of them will wink or something, which that's creepy and I'm never quite sure if I imagined it, but that could be just something programmed in. I've never--[turns aside as a demon comes up to him]--Oh, hi Bob. The onions are in the drawer over there. [Back to you] As I was saying, I've never seen this game manifest any dangerous forces, and I don't know why my cat keeps growling at my closet, but surely that's unrelated!

So take my word for it, Taboo is 100% completely safe! It is in fact not Taboo at all!

Now I'm gonna go astral project by consuming illicit substances, which is also totally safe and won't lead to me getting both hospitalized and possessed (or even possessed by hospitals...)